Drunken stupor

I always prided myself on knowing my limits, with alcohol.  I never got really, really trashed - was always in control and seemed to hit a wall where I didn't really get any more drunk, or didn't let myself at least.

Seems I can't do that anymore. I don't seem to have that transitionary period now - I go from stone cold sober to hideously drunk with no warning. No being tipsy, just horribly drunk.

Worst of all, I'm turning in to the kind of drunk I hate. The drunk that I stay away from, the sort that I try not to drink with, because I don't like it when they are like that.

*sigh*

Guess I'm getting old and can't drink like I used too. Or maybe I just feel more safe with the people with. Or maybe I just want to feel something, anything, so in some backwards way of thinking I drink to be someone I'm not, in the hope I'll feel something I don't.

Well that was a happy post, wasn't it?

Over and out.

Mel

I got good at feeling bad

I wish I could tell my friends how much they mean to me.  Sometimes I think I don't give enough, and im so terrified...I don't know of what. Maybe I do. Maybe I just don't want to say.

Just wish I could be my self with people more.  I'm probably not that bad a person underneath this facade I put on.

I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm drunk.